March 12, 2007

I DREAMED I WON THE LOTTERY LAST NIGHT


Yours Truly in Tipperary

It was Spring and the smell of Verbena enveloped me as I strolled in the lush garden of my huge estate in Mobile, surrounded by Magnolia Grandiflora, Azaleas, Crepe Myrtle, Gardenia and orchards full of blooming Cherry trees. A beautiful lake filled with swans , surrounded by Weeping Willows caught my eye. Spectacular peacocks with their colorful plumes strutted about. This Garden of Eden was filled with every delight imaginable and although I had designed it myself, I had a full time crew that maintained it while I sat in the shade sipping Mint Juleps.

As I approached my Tara-like Mansion the huge front door opened and the group Alabama descended the stairs, strumming guitars and fiddles and singing my favorite songs. I felt like I was going to swoon when I saw Randy Owen himself on my front porch. It couldn't get much better, unless Gregory Peck were to come back to life. He was one of the best examples of God's handiwork that I've ever seen. As far as I'm concerned he could've just read the phone book .

Next thing I knew I was on a private jet to Ireland to visit my estate in the Emerald Isle . I love the Irish countryside - it's charming and quaint little villages, it's warm-hearted and humorous people. I've invited all the neighbors and we are having a wonderful outdoor get together. I've flown in George Strait, Alan Jackson, Clint Black, Loretta Lynn, Dolly Parton and George Jones to provide the entertainment. The Irish and I have a lot in common - we both like country music. Hee Haw !

Next stop was on the other side of the world - Korea, to see my many friends and relatives there and to stay awhile at my estate on Cheju Island, referred to as " the Hawaii " of Korea. We're having a huge Korean-style BBQ in the Asian landscaped garden that rivals the ones of the royal palace. I have a lot in common with Koreans as well : they love to sing, drink and dance and by golly, so do I. A couple of Koreans and a bottle of wine are good for an all night party. They've been dubbed " The Irish of the Orient. " Guess what ? They like country music too and if you've never heard "Tennessee Waltz " in Korean you're in for a treat. And besides, they are doing the South a favor by eating and drinking Kudzu concoctions.

Back on the jet heading to Chicago and my estate far away from the maddening crowds of the city. I've duplicated Tara again and the hundreds of acres of land are lushly planted and meticulously maintained by a full-time crew. I've invited all the stars from Chicago's country music festival to join me for an old fashioned BBQ and square dance. Seems a lot of Chicagoans like country, too.

The doorbell rang and I opened the door . BIG mistake. There stood a huge crowd of people all claiming to be my cousins. That's when I woke up. Rats!! You mean I didn't win the biggest jackpot in history, again ?

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