March 9, 2007

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A REDNECK GARDENER WHEN .....

POP QUIZ : Is this a Redneck or
Windy City Gardener ?

I swear my people are the only ones left that can laugh at themselves, or allow others to . Here's a sampling I found on the Garden Web titled You Know You're a Redneck Gardener when .....

You edge your flower bed with beer bottles.
You put a lot of artificial flowers in your flower bed.
You paint a sunflower on your giant satellite dish.
Your Christmas lights are up year round.
You mow your lawn and find a car.
Plant shrubs where your dog's already done the digging .
Have a plywood cutout of a fat lady in bloomers bending over your flower bed.
Have a Mr. and Mrs. Goose that has their own wardrobe that changes with the season.
You compost disposable diapers.


So I'm responding with : You know you're a Windy City gardener if :

You've got more than one Huge Colorado Spruce in your yard
You go dumpster-diving for flowers outside the garden center
Your evergreen shrubs look like green bubble gum
You have curtains hanging on your front porch
You have artificial flowers in your hanging baskets
You think a political sign is yard art
You keep your Christmas decorations up until June
Your idea of gardening is a yard full of flower cut-outs
You use white marble chips as mulch
You use red bark as mulch
You use Red Lava rocks as mulch
You have a chainlink fence around your yard with Morning Glory Vines



And they think Rednecks are funny. From now on I'm going to insist on being called an Appalachian-American. A Rose by any other name would smell as sweet. You bet'cha !

P.S. That might look like a Redneck garden, but it's actually in Chicago.

2 comments:

  1. I love it!! I certainly needed to read your post today! he~haw!!
    If I can, I am going to try and take a picture of a neighbors B-E-D in their front yard. Yes, that's right... a BED! She grows flowers in it. It's not pretty! LOL! If I get the pic, I'll post it on my blog and mention your post in honor of it! hahaha....

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice blog, keep it up!
    acwo
    http://tytka.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete

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